Managing Depression and Mental Health During Divorce

Managing Depression and Mental Health During Divorce

Going through a divorce can be an incredibly difficult and emotional time. It’s totally normal to feel sad, angry, stressed, anxious, or depressed during this major life transition. But while divorce depression is common, it’s important to actively manage your mental health so these feelings don’t spiral out of control. This article covers tips and strategies to help you cope with depression, anxiety, and other mental health challenges during and after divorce.

Recognizing the Signs of Divorce Depression

Divorce depression refers to prolonged and intense feelings of sadness, hopelessness, anger, or numbness after a divorce. This is different than just normal grieving – divorce depression can last for weeks or months and significantly impact your ability to function. Here are some common signs and symptoms of divorce depression:

• Feeling sad, empty, or hopeless nearly every day
• No longer finding pleasure in hobbies or activities you used to enjoy
• Having very low energy and feeling constantly fatigued
• Experiencing changes in appetite and unintended weight loss or gain
• Having difficulty sleeping or sleeping too much
• Feeling restless or irritable
• Having trouble concentrating, remembering details, or making decisions
• Experiencing physical symptoms like headaches, stomachaches, or back pain
• Feeling worthless, guilty, or like a failure
• Having recurrent thoughts of death or suicide

If you’ve experienced five or more of these symptoms for two weeks or longer, you may have clinical depression and should seek help from a mental health professional.

Causes of Divorce Depression

There are many complex reasons why divorce often leads to depression:

• Grief – Divorce means the loss of dreams, plans, and hopes you had for the future. It’s natural to grieve these losses.
• Stress – Divorce is incredibly stressful, both emotionally and logistically. This prolonged stress can lead to depression.
• Change – The massive life change of divorce is hard to cope with. Your entire daily routine changes.
• Loneliness – The loss of your spouse along with changes in your social circles can cause intense loneliness.
• Anger – Anger towards your former spouse can turn into depression over time.
• Financial – Financial challenges and a reduced standard of living due to divorce can cause depression.
• Identity – People often lose their sense of identity after divorce leading to depression.

Seeking Professional Help

If you think you may be experiencing divorce depression, it’s important to seek help from a licensed mental health professional as soon as possible. The right treatment can help lift depression so you can get through this difficult time. Treatment options may include:

• Medication – Antidepressants or anti-anxiety meds might be prescribed to help stabilize your mood.
• Psychotherapy – Talk therapy provides strategies for managing depression and grief.
• Support groups – Connecting with others experiencing divorce can reduce isolation.
• Lifestyle changes – Exercise, proper sleep, healthy eating, and stress reduction techniques.

Don’t be afraid to ask your primary care doctor for a referral to a psychiatrist or therapist. Admitting you need help takes courage but is so important.

Self-Care Tips for Coping with Depression

In addition to professional treatment, making self-care a priority can help you manage depression after divorce. Here are some self-care strategies to try:

• Let yourself grieve – Cry, journal, or create art to express your painful emotions. Don’t bottle them up.
• Lean on loved ones – Spend time with supportive friends and family who uplift you.
• Forgive yourself – Let go of guilt over the divorce and be kind to yourself.
• Get moving – Exercise releases feel-good endorphins and boosts your mood.
• Eat nutritious foods – A healthy, balanced diet provides energy and supports mental health.
• Establish routines – Follow a regular sleep schedule and other routines to add stability.
• Try relaxation techniques – Yoga, meditation, deep breathing, and mindfulness reduce anxiety.
• Avoid alcohol and drugs – They seem to help short-term but make depression worse long-term.

Don’t be afraid to ask loved ones for help around the house, with childcare, grocery shopping, rides to appointments, etc. You need to focus on your mental health right now.

Joining a Divorce Support Group

Support groups specifically for people going through divorce can be tremendously helpful. They provide a judgement-free space to process your emotions and realize you aren’t alone. Many areas have free in-person and online divorce support groups. Here are some benefits of joining one:

• Feeling validated and understood by people in the same situation
• Reducing isolation, shame, and stigma around divorce
• Learning coping strategies from those further along in the process
• Making new friends who can relate to what you’re going through
• Realizing your feelings and experiences are normal for divorce
• Gaining encouragement and empowerment from the group

Look online or call local therapists, churches, community centers, and mental health clinics to find a divorce support group near you. Attending just a few meetings can lift your spirits.

When to Seek Emergency Help

While sadness, grief, and depression are expected during divorce, feeling suicidal is not a normal response. If you have thoughts of harming yourself or start making plans to take your own life, seek emergency help right away. Here are some options if you’re having a mental health crisis:

• Call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255
• Text the Crisis Text Line at 741741
• Call 911 or go to the nearest emergency room
• Call your psychiatrist or therapist’s emergency number
• Ask a loved one to stay with you until feelings pass

Don’t wait until you reach a crisis point. Reach out for help when suicidal thoughts first start so you can get through this safely.

When you’re depressed, it can be hard to find the motivation to do anything. But making an effort to incorporate joy and self-care into every day is crucial for managing divorce depression. Here are some ideas:

• Take a warm bubble bath with candles and soothing music[1]
• Get a massage or reflexology treatment to reduce stress[2]
• Go for a nature walk and focus on the sights, sounds, and smells[3]
• Cuddle up with a pet or weighted blanket for comfort[4]
• Light candles and incense to create a relaxing environment[5]
• Drink herbal tea while reading an uplifting book or listening to a podcast[6]
• Take an art or dance class to express yourself creatively[1]
• Go out with supportive friends who make you laugh and smile[2]
• Explore a new hobby like gardening, knitting, or playing an instrument[3]
• Make your favorite childhood comfort foods from scratch[4]
• Display photos and items around your home that evoke positive memories[5]
• Write down things you’re grateful for each day in a journal[6]

While it takes effort, self-care is so important when you’re coping with divorce depression. Start small if needed, like taking 5 minutes to sip tea mindfully or writing down one daily gratitude. Tiny steps towards joy add up over time and help lift your spirits.