New York state law does not define any one particular crime as "domestic violence." Instead,…
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Legally speaking, domestic abuse is a fairly broad category. It can be a wide range of felony or misdemeanors that involve some sort of violence being committed towards a spouse, partner, child, family member, or someone else living in a home with a person. It can take many forms, including physical violence, emotional manipulation, threats, molestation, or verbal abuse. In general, anything that involves your ex being cruel or controlling towards you, your child, past partners, other children, siblings, or parents may be relevant when determining custody.
| Type of Domestic Abuse | Examples and Context |
|---|---|
| Physical Violence | Violence being committed towards a spouse, partner, child, family member, or someone else living in a home |
| Emotional Manipulation | Being cruel or controlling towards you, your child, past partners, other children, siblings, or parents |
| Threats | Can take many forms |
| Molestation | A wide range of felony or misdemeanors |
| Verbal Abuse |
When a court is hearing a custody case, the main thing they will be considering is simply what the best interests of your child will be. The things you bring up in court will affect the judge’s decision of course, but their primary goal will just to decide what is best for the child. Because there is a high risk of a child being hurt by a domestic abuser, most courts will tend to act very conservatively in cases that involve domestic abuse. They will typically try to be on the safe side and avoid awarding custody to a domestic abuser.
Though it is rather are for a domestic abuser to actually get full or partial custody of a child, this does not mean that a history of domestic abuse will keep your ex from ever seeing the child. Courts determine visitation separate from custody, so something that blocks a person from getting custody may not block them from getting visitation rights. This occurs because courts generally feel it is best for a child to have a relationship with both of their parents.
| Custody vs. Visitation | |
|---|---|
| Custody | Rather rare for a domestic abuser to actually get full or partial custody of a child |
| Visitation Rights | Courts determine visitation separate from custody, so something that blocks a person from getting custody may not block them from getting visitation rights |
| Courts generally feel it is best for a child to have a relationship with both of their parents | |
Keep in mind that courts will not automatically decide in your favor simply because you tell them that your ex partner was abusive. They will take into account allegations of domestic violence, but it is generally best to have some proof that it occurred. If your ex was actually convicted of domestic abuse, it will be very easy to prove. However, your spouse does not necessarily have to be convicted to lose custody. In some cases, even accusations or allegations may be enough to reduce a person’s chances of getting custody. You may be able to tell the court about the abuse with things like photos of injuries, police reports, or witnesses testifying on your behalf.
| Evidence Type | Strength | Notes |
|---|---|---|
| Criminal Conviction | Very Strong | If your ex was actually convicted of domestic abuse, it will be very easy to prove |
| Photos of Injuries | Strong | You may be able to tell the court about the abuse with these items |
| Police Reports | Strong | |
| Witnesses Testifying | Moderate to Strong | |
| Accusations or Allegations | Varies | In some cases, even accusations or allegations may be enough to reduce a person’s chances of getting custody |
| Your spouse does not necessarily have to be convicted to lose custody | ||
To keep an abusive ex partner from getting custody, it is useful to have plenty of proof and help from a professional attorney. Having a good lawyer on your side will help you to more accurately explain your situation and show the court why it is in your child’s best interest to stay away from your ex. Since each specific state tends to have their own unique laws surrounding custody and domestic abuse, you will need someone who is quite knowledgeable about custody law in your state. Navigating all of the challenges of a child custody case with domestic abuse will be tricky, but there is hope that you may be able to get the best possible outcome.
| Court Consideration | Details |
|---|---|
| Best Interests of the Child | The main thing they will be considering is simply what the best interests of your child will be |
| Things You Bring Up | The things you bring up in court will affect the judge’s decision of course |
| Risk to Child | Because there is a high risk of a child being hurt by a domestic abuser, most courts will tend to act very conservatively |
| Conservative Approach | They will typically try to be on the safe side and avoid awarding custody to a domestic abuser |
| State-Specific Laws | Each specific state tends to have their own unique laws surrounding custody and domestic abuse |

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